Let me first start our by saying that this post is in NO way meant to be an “oh woe is me post” but rather a comic review of a “series of
disasterous unfortunate events” that I’d like to share with you prior to posting a true Cruise re-cap. Becuase in all honesty, we had a WONDERFUL vacation (the Husband and I keep joking that is was the worst best vacay ever or the best worst vacay ever LOL). And I plan to do a full recap of the marvulosity (just made that word up but love it) and amazingness of the trip MINUS the mention of the following blunders that occurred. It is VERY funny, by the way, that the last post I wrote before leaving was entitled “Cruisin’…hopefully not for a bruisin.” OK, are you ready?! Buckle your safety belts people, it was a wild ride 😉
1. On day 1 at sea (Monday), I decided to take a jog with the Husband on the onboard jogging track on the 12the level (the second highest). Well, it wasn’t the BEST idea…
a. The wind was fierce at times and the ships movement went against your gate at times throwing you off and making you feel like you had
sea lead legs.
b. The track was about a foot wide. Need I say more?
c. The track went through highly populated public areas (think crowd watching a men’s sexy leg contest…yup) so you had to weaving in and out and run as if you had car breaks. ‘Scuse me just wasn’t working. People definitely scowl at you when they’re trying to down their spare ribs and you’re whizzing around (dodging) them
singing mouthing the lyrics to “Imma Be.” Nice visual, right?
d. Workers were trying to paint the space between the tracks’ lip (see e) and the edge of the ship so I had to pass them every lap around (5.5=1 mile) and I felt TERRIBLE about it, like such a nuisance.
e. OK, the lip- the track was a lovely squishy rubber one but had a lip that went down about an inch to concrete that went to the edge of the ship (only about a foot more, but with a hand rail)
Right, so speaking of the lip…I don’t know if a wave came or wind and severely rocked the boat so I lost my balance, or if I was veering around the many basketball spectators, but my foot went off the track at the lip and turned under . It hurt SOOOOO badly! So I shake it off; the basketball ref even saw if asked asked if I was ok. I wanted to keep going- I was having a lot of fun other than having to weave in and out of people; the view was magnificent, the wind refreshing, and the people-watching plentiful 🙂 Anyway, a the this point, Husband came by and informed me he was going to stop. It was kinda crazy. He was kinda right (number one of many times I am to blame for the various mishaps on this trip). Anyway, I do what any stubborn idiot would do; I run two more miles. Honestly, ankle felt fine. It didn’t even occur to me to ice it. So the next morning, (duh) it is the size of a golf ball. Awesome.
The boat convenience store does NOT sell ace bandages. Awesome again. So long story
less long short, the ship medic gives me a cool brace thing, ace bandage-like but better. They didn’t even charge me because it was deemed a “ship injury.” They had to log it as they do for all injuries they have to report. Anyway, I iced it on and off for the rest of that night, but knew that in the morning I was going bike riding, so I used the wrap the next morning. Speaking of bike riding, here comes number two.
2. On the first day in Bermuda (Wednesday) Husband and I decided to rent PEDDLE bikes (rather than scooters because I was being a wuss…again, my fault-numner two if you are counting) and bike to a beach. We knew there was a rail path about three miles away that didn’t allow cars that we could take to a beach and chill.
So about 3 miles (of course) into the bike trip (which was thus far hilly, narrow streets with busses whizzing by and driving on the other side of the road and in one word death-deying) I rode my bike into a wall while trying to get up onto a narrow sidewalk to avoid the traffic. My lower arm took the brunt of the fall, followed by mu knuckles (couldn’t fit my rings on- awesome) then my upper arm (just minor scrape and bruise).
It was so cool how we could just pull our bikes over and take take dip in the ocean. Gorgeous. Bermuda is lovely. Anyway, we then went to a drugstore and got Bactine, antibiotic ointment (like Neosporin), and bandages. I have dressed my wounds like crazy and am in constant fear of infection. I’m a hypochondriac. No. Really.
3. OK, this one is minor, but still…on day 2 in Bermuda (Thursday) we went snorkeling to a shipwreck and tons of coral reef…that I stepped on and burt the bottom of my foot on because I couldn’t wear the flippers that made my bum ankle hurt. Awesome.
4. The last day at sea (Saturday), the boat went through a really bad storm with 65 mile an hour winds and 18 foot waves. Needless to say, the boat was super rocky and many people; including myself, got seasick. Yup, me with my sea bands and me, who took Dramamine, vomited. A lot. Awesome.
5. Suffice to say, I was eager at this point to get home, although I really DID enjoy the trip…I think I was worried about what might happen next LOL! So we get off the ship, get to our car, and…dead. Yup, battery dead. You might ask what was left on, but Husband checked everything before we left for the cruise to make sure nothing was. Uh-huh. So I see this man walking to his car who was on our cruise and I asked if he could give us a jump. He says, “sure.” He gets to his car…it’s dead. Awesome. The port authority ended up having jump box and was able to jump us; they said this happens a lot with people leaving their cars for a week or longer. So with the jump, my dashboard somehow completely blew out. This meant we drove all the way from NYC home (to PHL) not know how fast we were going (good thing husband was driving) or how much gas we had. Again, Awesome.
OK, so I definitely used to thing bad things happened in threes…hmmmm…. But seriously, some of these things are downright funny. Sort of 😉 Tell me of a trip disaster you experienced!